African Enterprise letter to parliamentarians

8 August 2006

The Honourable , MP
Parliament
PO Box 15
CAPE TOWN
8000

Dear Hon ,

We in African Enterprise have been following the progress of the debate surrounding same-sex marriage in South Africa with great interest and concern. As it is now Parliament’s responsibility to take up this issue and make decisions regarding marriage in South Africa which will have enormous consequences for all our citizens – most especially families and children – we would like respectfully to ask that you give attention to the following relevant points in the debate.

What is marriage?
Marriage has been around about as long as human beings have existed and has, in all cultures and contexts throughout human history, been heterosexual (with the exception now of a few Western nations in the last several years). One essential aspect of marriage is that it sanctifies and publicly endorses the love that exists between a man and a woman who desire to live their lives together. But marriage is about more than this and the most salient other aspect of the institution is that it is procreative – i.e., that it be about producing children, who will make up the next generation and keep the human race, and the South African nation, growing at a rate that will sustain positive growth. That a small number of married couples either cannot have, or choose not to have, children does not invalidate this basic general fact about marriage.

Once children are a part of the picture, it behoves us as adult societal actors to seek to operate and govern society in large part with their best interests in mind, such that we live up to the responsibility entrusted to us as their parents and models. Thus the question arises: What family arrangement is in the best interests of children? Virtually all social science research has demonstrated that an intact family comprising a father, mother and child or children is the best environment in which a child can be loved, disciplined and instructed in how to become a positively contributing member of society. It is of course tragic and of great concern when a family unit is damaged or destroyed, either through separation or divorce, or by the removal of one or both parents through abandonment, death, disease or other calamity. But our aim as a society should be to do all we can to strengthen the traditional family structure for everyone’s benefit, but most of all for that of the children. It would be saddening and foolhardy indeed for our society to set up as conscious policy family structures that would be damaging, or even less than optimally enriching, to our children. Children need, and deserve, both a mother and a father who are married to one another. We must do all we can to ensure that they get both by strengthening traditional marriage.

How does same-sex marriage affect marriage?
We in South Africa are in something of an advantageous position as we consider same-sex marriage because we can look at how this novel institution has affected other societies and nations who have adopted it. Most especially we can look at The Netherlands, the first country to formalise same-sex marriage in 2000, but which first passed registered partnerships in 1997. We see that the Dutch out-of-wedlock birthrate has increased by an average of at least 2 percentage points for nine consecutive years, a rise greater than that of any other Western European nation and rivalled only by a few Eastern European countries whose social systems are recovering from near-total collapse in the wake of the demise of their communist governments. The reason for this? When marriage is redefined to include same-sex couples, heterosexuals very quickly begin to decide that marriage doesn’t mean much of anything and so why bother? Is it a good thing to have an increasing out-of-wedlock birthrate? Certainly not. Children need, and deserve, both a mother and a father who are married to one another. We must do all we can to ensure that they get both by strengthening traditional marriage.

Do many gays and lesbians get married if given the right?
Some say that same-sex couples are being denied their civil rights by not being allowed to marry. So, once given the opportunity to marry, wouldn’t we expect a huge surge of same-sex marriages to occur, especially as there would surely be a pent-up demand from same-sex couples who have never had this right and would rush out to claim it? The experience of other countries demonstrates that not many same-sex couples actually choose to get married if given the chance. In The Netherlands, there were 2 414 same-sex marriages in 2001, 1 838 in 2002, 1 499 in 2003, 1 210 in 2004 and 1 166 in 2005 (out of a total population of 16,4 million). Belgium saw 1 708 same-sex marriages in seven months of 2003, and 2 204 in all of 2004 (out of a total population of 10,4 million). In The Netherlands, then, between 2 percent and 6 percent of the gay and lesbian population (or 0,05 percent of the total population) have availed themselves of the right of same-sex marriage since it was legalised, and in Belgium between 2 percent and 5 percent of the gay and lesbian population have done so (or 0,04 percent of the total population). Does it make good sense to so radically alter and damage so vital a social institution as marriage for the supposed benefit of so few? We believe not. Same-sex marriage does not give children both a mother and a father. But children need, and deserve, both a mother and a father who are married to one another. We must do all we can to ensure that they get both by strengthening traditional marriage.

We appeal to you, then, as a person entrusted with great responsibility for the future of our nation – which resides in our children – to take to heart our concerns, along with those of many others, and seek with all courage and wisdom to strengthen traditional marriage – that between a man and a woman – so that as many of our children as possible grow up in an intact family with both a mother and a father. They will thereby have the best foundation from which to aspire to live out their dreams and their potential as positively contributing members of society.

We call on you to join with other Parliamentarians to enact a Constitutional Amendment that will define marriage as the union of a man and a woman. We note that Parliament has amended the Constitution twelve times since 1996 (i.e., an average of more than one amendment each year), sometimes in regard to matters far less consequential than the definition of the most central institution in all of human history. It is altogether right and proper, we believe, for Parliament, as the elected representative of the people of this nation, to shoulder this responsibility and not leave this matter to be decided by a small number of unelected judges, nor to succumb to a Court judgement which is so unreflective of the views of the vast majority of South African citizens and which is also anathema to African culture.

We pledge to you to keep you in our prayers as you take up this matter which is vital beyond any other you will consider in your political career.

Sincerely,



Greg Smerdon Esmé Bowers
Team Leader Chairperson of the Board